Entri – 6 [Doa & Ingatan]

 Entri-6

Aku ingat lagi, awal – awal masuk mengajar aku dah pasang niat, buat ni semua untuk duit je dan jangan get attached sangat dengan the kids. Tapi sebenarnya aku pasang niat tu out of fear.  Tak lama lepas tu, aku tahu niat tu tak kena dengan apa yang sebenarnya aku nak untuk those kids. Niat tu dengan sendirinya berubah, mana nak tipu perasaan sendiri bila kau tengok those eyes hari – hari. Those innocent and eager-to-learn eyes. Selalu, tengok lama – lama mata dorang pun boleh bikin sempit dada nak nangis.  

In week 3, I realised my attachment to my students were getting stronger. Awal tu, aku macam nafikan la dengan diri sendiri. Sebab aku dah start nangis all the time balik. I was good, I was positive about them, but that did not really help to calm down my worries. Bila tengah – tengah buat revision, then teringat dorang, mesti menitik. Malam sebelum tidur, mesti nangis sebab teringat dorang. Every night mimpikan dorang. Bangun tengah malam semata - mata nak doakan dorang, lepastu banjir lagi. Aku jarang bangun solat malam, aku sendiri pun terkejut tbh bila mudah je aku bangun almost setiap malam tanpa alarm, cuma set kepala je nak bangun untuk berdoa. Paling tak tahan, bangun-bangun je dah sebak, pastu nangis. Haru betul hidup aku dekat 3 bulan tu. I sound really desperate right? I know. I did feel desperate, desperate for God to ease their way in studying, desperately asking God to make them realised of their potentials. Bangun tidur, bersiap nak pergi sekolah pun selalu rasa sebak tapi bersemangat. Dia macam, ok, kau boleh Aini, pastu mata berair. They were on my mind all the time. Despite all that, I enjoyed having the thoughts of them at all times. It always started with a smile and ended with tears. I remember clearly, the last time I felt this pumped up when I was in primary school. I loved going to school back then and always planned my days ahead. The feelings were similar, I felt very positive about everything and it felt like nothing could bring me down. I felt really good. It was like; those kids made me rediscovered my purpose of life.

I buat revision all the time, I wanted to ace in teaching. I wanted to try my best to make them understand what I was going to teach, I wanted to deliver and show them how learning can be so much fun while the responsibilities as a student wouldn't be so palpable that it is stressful. There is always a way for things.  Aku boleh rasa aku tekun gila buat revision masa jadi cikgu ganti ni, bila masa senggang, lepastu balik sekolah, lepastu malam before tidur. Kalau lah masa high school aku study kuat macam ni hahahaha.

I had my favourite time at my favourite spot when I was at the school. Dekat depan pejabat sekolah, ada bangku panjang, and around 7.30 am, memang cahaya matahari akan tegak kena pada bangku tu and there was me, almost every morning, sitting there, enjoying the warmth of the sunlight felt on my skin. The warmth felt so good. I would be sitting there for quite some time while doing my revision. And it always feels good to study on your own will.

During the first and the second week of teaching, bila ada masa terluang, sebab rasa bosan, kadang pasang Kdrama. There was nothing much to do besides doing revision and prepared the apparatus for the experiment, which did not take much of my times pun. Tapi after some days of doing it, it did not sit right with me. I realised I could always watch Kdramas at other times but this opportunity might not come often, and I should be doing my very best, not just my best. After that, I always studied or having students over, to discuss about other subjects, talking about life. Besides teaching science, during recess or whenever I had free time, I guided them in maths and a bit of English. Lower form maths is easy and fun to learn, I was always glad to contribute in some ways. English on the other side is always a bit tricky to be taught. You go the wrong way, the session will be boring.  

  

 

 

Entri – 5 [High School Crush]

 Entri-5

Benda ni jadi masa aku kat depan kelas tengah mengajar and tiba – tiba tertangkap pandang yang this one male student, Hafizuddin asyik duk pandang one of my female students. Sekejap tengok, sekejap tengok. Hujung mata je lah tapi bila dah kau berdiri kat depan, dorang semua duduk, memang boleh nampak semua. I guess, he was not really paying attention to what I was saying. I didn’t call him out right away, saying to myself this can wait.

Kelas sains haritu kelas last before balik, so lepas ramai dah keluar, aku pun saja lah panggil Hafizuddin ke depan, sambil aku kemas meja.

“Hafizuddin, awak minat Mel ke?”

Muka dia dah nampak terkejut tapi cepat – cepat dia cover.

“Eh, mana ada Miss. Tak lah.”

“Tapi tadi masa kelas saya, banyak kali awak pandang dia. Jeling – jeling dia yang duduk kat depan.”

“Miss nampak ke?”

“Hahaha Hafiz, saya kat depan, saya nampak semua benda. Ni kenapa tersipu – sipu ni?”

“Lain kali cover sikit eh. Bukan main tersenyum – senyum.”

Aku cakap kat dia dalam nada mengusik. Benda ni normal dalam kalangan budak – budak sekolah. Aku bukan siapa nak halang ke, nak marah.

Sebab dulu aku pun tertangkap dengan teacher English aku. The guy kena panggil depan baca poem, aku ni dah duk tersenyum – senyum macam apa je.

I remember the guy rarely smiled. Tapi lepas dia habis baca puisi kat depan, dia senyum malu sebab macam tak sure okay ke tak dia baca. Lepas tu kebetulan, teacher berdiri betul-betul sebelah aku, dia bercakap sendiri,

“Manis rupanya dia ni senyum.”

Aku pun laju je membalas, padahal teacher tak tanya aku pun, aku pun macam separa sedar je cakap,

“Haah, manis kan.”

Teacher pun terjerit kecil,

“Haa, pandai eh awak Aini!! ”

Aku senyum je lah, dah takkan aku nak nafikan kot. Benda betul hshshs.

Entri – 4 [Rokok & Perhatian]

 

Entri-4.

Loceng waktu balik dah bunyi. Aku habiskan kelas dan bagi dorang keluar. Tengah aku susun barang aku, budak – budak lelaki masih kat meja dorang. Aku tak ingat macam mana perbualan pasal rokok start tapi we started to talk about smoking dan bahaya merokok. Budak perempuan semua dah keluar masa tu.

Aku tahu cakap pasal benda is a bit tricky lagi – lagi bila kau tahu some of them merokok jugak. Kau tak nak sounds pushy or negative sangat depan dorang, dan aku pun never wanted hatred to fill the room.  Not when I'm in control. I always want the room I'm in to be judgement – free. I believe, there’s always a room for improvement.

Aku bagitahu pendapat aku pasal merokok dan bahaya merokok. I know it is bad. Everyone knows that. Tapi dalam soal ni, kita kena pandai main peranan. Lagi – lagi tengah cakap dengan remaja, tahu je lah perangai darah panas dan cepat melenting, kalau silap cara. Tengah – tengah aku cakap, aku perasan sesetengah daripada dorang kurang selesa tapi still nak dengar aku bercakap. Aku hargai benda tu.

Dan sebagai cikgu sains yang baik (aagitu), mestilah aku nak kena kait rokok dan sains, dan kesan pada badan. Cerita santai – santai. Masa tu aku bercakap memang tengok dorang ja. Alih – alih pandang kat tingkap kelas, penuh budak – budak lelaki kelas lain and ada beberapa budak kelas sebelah yang aku ingat muka masuk dan ikut dengar. Tiba – tiba aku jadi segan.  

Lepastu ada this one male student tanya pasal asap rokok dan macam mana asap terbentuk. Aku perasan dia bukan nak tahu sangat, cuma dia macam nak test aku. Ada senyum sinis pada akhir perkataan dia. Dan aku tak ambil hati, biasalah. Aku pun baru sangat lagi kat sekolah ni.

Aku ingat aku balas kat dia and made direct eye contact,

“Uuuu a good question, tapi miss tak pasti, tapi takpe, nanti miss check, cari jawapan, nanti Miss update okay?”

Aku senyum seikhlasnya pada dia dan aku perasan dia nampak somewhat terkejut yang aku ambil serius soalan dia. Maybe he thought I was just going to brush him off, in the room full of voices and questions from other students. How I wish I could let him know that I take people around me very seriously, I appreciate all of their questions, walaupun I don’t know them well, ni kan pulak dia, yang student aku.

In my style of teaching, there’s no such thing as stupid questions. I appreciate every question coming from them. I will always try my best to answer them or to find answer for them, if I don’t know the answer, I will ask them to find the answer for the questions too, so that we could discuss them in class, that will be so much fun, getting to exchange opinions and answers. Tapi ada je sesetengah soalan dorang buat aku panas hati sikit, mostly sebab cara tanya tu tak kena. Bila aku perasan cara dorang tanya atau soalan tu macam kurang kena, aku tegur jugak, as a teacher, kena tegur, dorang akan faham sebab dorang pun dah dewasa.    

Dan satu hal, I never want anyone in my class, or people around me, to feel left out because of me. I know how that makes me feel small or not belonged, and I never wanted them to feel the same way, at least not when I am around or in control. I am here to listen if anyone got something to say. Dan aku punya notion, lagi – lagi jadi cikgu ni, kita kena meraikan soalan. Kalau soalan dorang macam tak kena, kita cuba fikir possible questions yang dorang sebenarnya nak tanya, biasalah, kadang dalam kepala lain, yang di-articulate nya lain. Banyak lah faktor, cuak ke, terganggu dengan kawan ke. Kalau cara dorang sampaikan soalan tu kurang kena daripada sepatutnya, kurang sopan ke, kita tegur secara baik. Jadi tanggungjawab kita untuk tegur untuk sama – sama baiki mana perlu. Aku takde lah cakap aku baik ke apa, aku mengarut jugak, tapi sama – sama lah. Bila those students get treated like how it is supposed to be, itu akan boost dorang punya self – esteem dan sense of belonging, yang akan contribute minat dorang untuk belajar. Tapi aku faham, bila dah dalam kelas dekat 30 lebih, nak betul – betul bagi full attention kat setiap sorang tu, agak mustahil lah.

Raikan setiap soalan, ambil setiap soalan dari sudut positif, sama – sama belajar. Cukup lah dengan pegangan orang – orang muda tak faham, budak – budak takkan faham. Kalau kita cuba fahamkan dorang, dorang akan faham. Apa lagi kalau dorang memang nak faham. Even kids that age under 4 pun, dorang boleh faham kalau kita fahamkan dorang.

On the next week, I shared with them the answer; on how smoke is produced. It always feels good to share something with people and I was glad it was something new to them.

Entri – 3 [Kerepek]

 Entri - 3.

Masa ni aku baru lepas buat ulang kaji kat meja, bilik guru pun tak banyak suara masa tu, mungkin sebab ramai ada kelas, lagi pun masa tu lagi dua jam waktu sekolah habis.

Aku tengok jam, tak lama pun lagi waktu aku nak masuk kelas yang terakhir untuk haritu. Tiba – tiba dengar orang buka pintu bilik guru and bagi salam. Aku yang tengah sandar kepala pada kerusi, jawab salam antara helaan nafas. Aku tak bangun pun jenguk siapa. Tak rasa nak bangun.

Biasa lah, bila dah lama sangat duduk, mesti kena jalan – jalan sikit. Kalau tak, penat jugak sampai ke sudah duduk je, sakit jugak pinggang. Tempat aku macam tersorok sikit, so kena keluar sikit baru nampak ruang tengah and meja cikgu lain. Masa tu lah mata aku tertangkap susuk tubuh yang duduk tersandar dekat sofa rotan ruang tengah tu. Aku perasan mata dia  tertutup. Terlena mungkin. Nampak penat betul.

Aku perasan ada plastik besar dekat dengan dia, dan boleh nampak dalam plastik besar tu ada macam – macam jenis kerepek. Kejap mata aku perhatikan mata mak cik tu, kedut pada muka dia, dan masa tu jugak lah mata aku dah rasa berair. Entah lah apa aku rasa masa tu tapi aku fikir, mesti penat dia jalan dengan dua plastik besar, nak naik bukit lagi, aku yang dah berapa minggu kat sini pun, mesti mengah setiap kali lepas naik bukit sebelum nak sampai bilik guru.

Sekejap je pipi aku dah basah. Ada rasa simpati yang menyelit tapi cepat – cepat aku tepis, aku fikir, kenapa nak kesian, at least dia ada usaha walaupun umur dah tua macam tu. Aku yang patut malu kalau umur macam ni tapi tak bersungguh nak hidup. Cepat – cepat aku balik tempat aku, tarik nafas. Layankan sedih, sampai bila pun tak habis.

Aku ambil beg duit dalam bagpack aku, check ada duit tak. Aku bukan jenis pegang duit kat tangan, lagi – lagi kat sekolah aku tak makan, habis sekolah then balik rumah baru aku makan berat. Aku nampak ada 15 ringgit, sebab aku tak guna pun, aku pun ambil duit tu and pergi kat tempat mak cik tu duduk. Aku perasan dia dah terjaga, aku cakap aku nak beli 15 paket, sebab 1 paket seringgit. Aku perasan ada kerepek yang dah lama aku suka tapi dah lama tak makan. Aku ambil yang tu tiga dan yang lagi 12 mana yang aku nampak sedap. Mesti mak cik tu fikir, lapar betul budak ni, hahahaha, tak kisah lah.

Aku letak 3 bungkus dalam beg aku, so nanti bila rasa nak mengunyah aku boleh keluarkan, dan yang lagi 12, aku bawak sekali keluar bilik guru dengan buku teks and pencil case aku, pergi makmal sebab aku ada last kelas sebelum waktu balik.

Makmal kosong lagi, aku pun letak 3 bungkus setiap meja.

Ada a few budak lelaki datang awal dan dorang ambil tempat duduk kat meja paling depan.

“Miss, apa ni? Miss dah nak pergi ke?”

“Eh takde lah hahaha, saya beli tadi. Makan lah. Makan sambil dengar saya mengajar. Makan sekarang pun boleh.”

“Ye ke miss ni, ke ada something ni?”

“Betul takde apa – apa, makan lah :)"

Kawan dia kat sebelah, “eh, makan je lah miss dah bagi, banyak pulak kau tanya.”

Aku gelak je, dorang ni macam – macam. Dia orang offer, tapi aku tolak, cakap aku dah ada aku punya sendiri kat bilik guru.  

Entri Khas; Mak

Betul lah, manusia ni kelihatan sangat polos pada dua keadaan, ketika lena dan menyuap makan. 

Dan aku terfikir lagi, tenang yang macam ni ke yang mak kita selalu rasa, bila dorang tengok kita makan, walaupun dorang tak makan? Teringat satu puisi Aan Mansyur, yang tajuknya Rindu;

 

Bumi tidak butuh banyak bulan.

Bulan sendiri, pandai dan kekanak-kanakan. 

Dia bisa jadi pisang ambon, mangkuk pecah

ibumu, atau martabak utuh jika kau lapar. 

Dia akan menertawai kerakusanmu atau 

menjadi penuh ketika kau kosong.

 

“Kenapa mak senyum – senyum ni? Mak teringat apa?”

“Takde lah, mak seronok tengok kamu makan.”

“Mak tak makan?”

“Tak, mak dah kenyang, kamu makanlah.”

 

Dan kita tersenyum melihat mak tersenyum. Polos dan ikhlasnya kasih mak jelas nampak pada tenang senyumnya. Seronok bila mak teman makan. Dan bunyi kita menyuap makan yang kadang diselangi dengan pesan – pesan pendek mak; mengisi jeda antara setiap suapan.

 

 “Perlahan – lahanlah makan. Banyak lagi ni.”

“Hehe, sedaap mak!”

 

Melebar senyum mak.

Jeda – jeda pendek yang dikongsi dengan mak ketika waktu makan itu is one of the most comforting silence that one day will be missed, yang takkan dapat ditukar dengan apa – apa.

 

Bila dengan mak, tenangnya rasa lain.

Tenang yang sesetengah daripada kita rindukan. Tenang yang sebahagian daripada kita tak perasan. 

Mana mungkin ada mereka yang sayangkan kita seperti mana mak. Bila hilangnya kasih mak, ibarat hilanglah sebahagian besar daripada diri kita.

 

Kasih mak sampai syurga. Semoga syurga yang tertinggi untuk mak. Cuma syurga selayaknya untuk mak.

 

Pandangan redup mak seperti segara dalam; yang menyimpan seribu rasa yang mungkin kita takkan dapat pernah huraikan walaupun pada akhir cerita.

 

Mak, kita semua rindukan mak. 

Selamat hari raya mak.

Entri-2 [Kantin]

 Entri-2

Masa ni dah minggu kedua mengajar, so dah slow – slow nampak rentak lah. Mana nak kena improve, mana nak kena control sikit. I dah start gain balik my confidence, cakap kat diri sendiri,

“Kau boleh ni, kau anggap je macam kau buat presentation masa kat uni, tapi ni  hari – hari. Kau takyah cuak, sebab takde kawan – kawan sebaya ke, lecturer ke. Kau boleh handle ni. Cuba je semampu kau, yang penting sampai apa yang kau ajar.”

So haritu, I ada kelas form 3 lepas rehat. Target I, masa rehat nanti, I nak bertenang – tenang, so I buat revision before tu lah sementara ada masa sikit. Frankly, I was having fun doing the revision, sebab sebenarnya seronok bila kita dapat luang masa, and belajar balik benda yang kita belajar dulu masa kat sekolah. Masa yang betul – betul hanya untuk tu. And science is always fun to learn. Haritu nak masuk bab yang V equals to IR, so sebab ada masa lebih lepas revision, I pun pergi makmal and cuba cari litar, wire and bateri yang boleh pakai, set up terus, so nanti senang bawak pergi kelas. I fikir, kalau benda yang kita explain tu, then boleh tunjuk benda tu so that dorang nampak, it’s going to be easier for them to process the information. Then nanti boleh mintak dorang buat, tengok faham ke tak.

Then masuk waktu rehat. I pun, okay, nak bertenang sekejap. I dah balik bilik guru balik lepas pergi makmal. I pun bangun jalan pusing – pusing dekat tempat I. Masa tu baru rehat, then nampaklah students berpusu – pusu beratur beli makanan. Ada yang datang dengan kawan, berlari, jalan sambil gelak. Daripada berjalan setempat, I dah tegak berdiri, menghadap kantin. I pun jadi ralit sendiri, dan tak sedar I dah senyum sorang – sorang, seronok tengok gelagat dorang. Tiba – tiba ada rasa yang tertahan, entah, jadi sebak sendiri. Seronok nampak dorang menyuap makan, nampak polos sangat. Sedar – sedar mata I dah basah, menitik – nitik air mata, sampai basah tudung.

Kebanyakan daripada mereka I tak kenal pun, tapi rasa sayang tu, macam bertumpah – tumpah.

Perlahan – lahan I panjatkan doa pada Tuhan, ya Allah, rahmatilah mereka. Rahmatilah mereka. Lindungilah mereka.

Aku terfikir, betul lah, manusia ni kelihatan sangat polos pada dua keadaan, ketika lena dan menyuap makan.

Aaaa sudah, ni tanda dah jatuh sayang ke?

Entri-1 [Hari Pertama]

 Entri-1.

I remember saying this to myself on the first day of working as a substitute teacher at this one high school,

“Aini, let’s just do this for money. Remember, more money, more books. And please, do not get attached to anyone here.”

No, I’m not going to write the whole entries in English, whenever it suits.

So, long story short, aku ajar Science form 1 and form 3. Aku pegang 4 kelas, 2 kelas form 1, paling depan and paling hujung and 2 kelas form 3. Awal tu, bila dorang assigned kelas form 3, terfikir jugak, betul ke dorang nak bagi aku jaga kelas exam ni. Dah lah masa tu lagi 3 bulan setengah gitu nak PT3. Tapi aku macam, okay je lah, boleh kot, takkan nak cakap banyak pulak kan.

Aku dapat tempat yang agak tersorok dan sangatlah bersyukur so that tak payahlah rasa serba – salah kalau tak tahu nak sembang apa. Tempat duduk tu memang betul – betul membelakangi kantin, so kalau aku pusing kerusi, boleh nampaklah students makan kat meja tu.

Haritu hari Khamis. Kebetulan semua kelas ada. Serius cuak, tapi cakap kat diri sendiri, redah je lah Aini, nak layan cuak tu bukan bawak ke mana pun. Terus bawak buku teks form 3, phone and pencil case pergi kelas 3 Canggih. Aku cakap awal – awal, kalau bab introduction, aku memang jammed. Tak kisahlah in starting conversations ke, in writing.

So, masuk je kelas tu, dorang bangun bagi salam and baca doa, then duduk. Pastu semua terdiam sekejap. Aku dah macam, “apa the best way nak start eh? Weh, tak boleh, tak boleh, kau kena cepat Aini, kau in control ni”, sambil belek buku teks cari bab electricity. Sempatlah skimmed through dalam bilik guru tadi kejap before masuk kelas. Takde perkenalkan diri apa semua, terus ja aku cerita pasal kilat. Masatu, suara aku macam tenggelam timbul je kat telinga sendiri, aku rasa macam di awan – awangan pun ya. Yang pasti sejuk satu badan dah masatu. Aku cuba elak eye contact tapi entah macam mana terpandang this one male student yang ekspresi muka dia confused and nampak obviously, suspiciously judging. Agak tegang jugak lah muka dia, masatu aku dah rasa down sikit plus. Tapi memang tak nampak rentak lagi lah masatu.  

Expression macam tu tak pelik lah dah kalau kau masuk –masuk kelas terus bagitahu harini kita akan masuk tajuk electricity. Tak perkenalkan diri, apa pun tak. Undeniably a bad start, duh.

Dah habis tiga-tiga kelas, aku balik bilik guru, duduk diam kat meja sendiri sambil termenung, reflect teaching method aku. Ni kalau cikgu betul tengok first day aku, confirm geleng kepala.

Balik rumah, aku demam 2 hari. Demam terkejut lah kot.  

 

Forget The Ordinary: We A Got Better Niacinamide Serum from Geek & Gorgeous!

 I still remember when I was using Niacinamide serum from the Ordinary in few years back. I remember how it was always getting foamy whenever I tried to rub it in and balled up and left me feeling annoyed. Like, how you are going to work if you get balled up all the time? Not forget the discomfort my skin experienced every time I applied it on my skin. I’m not sure what makes me persevere, but it always stung my skin, thus the discomfort.

Since then, I refused to try any particular niacinamide serum, because the fear of experiencing the same thing. Is anyone here in the same boat with me?

So, what’s the best niacinamide serum we are going to talk about now?

✨ Geek & Gorgeous B-Bomb 10% Niacinamide Serum✨

Key ingredients: 10% Niacinamide to regulate oil production, strengthen skin barrier, improve the appearance of enlarged pores, helps with hyperpigmentation and helps with dullness. Zinc PCA has the anti-aging benefits, has anti-microbial properties, helps to control acne besides decreases the sebum production, on the other hand, Sarcosine is a synthetic amino acid derivative that also acts as oil-control agent and enhancing the penetration of other ingredients.

Texture: It has a clear, slightly tacky, light gel texture which is fast – absorbing

Best for: People with acne-prone skin, oily skin and anyone who loves adding niacinamide serum in their routine!

Experience: What I really like about this serum is the fact that it is very easy to be layered with other products without pilling, besides being very spreadable. I swear, it is such a turn-off if the products pill. Post – application does not leave my skin feels sticky or greasy, not at all! Yet providing a slight glow to my skin, helps me to cover my skin dullness, which is pretty much appreciated :) Usually, 3-4 drops of this serum is enough to cover all my face and neck and I usually use this after a toner. This serum feels great to be used together with Garden of Wisdom Alpha Arbutin serum.

After a few weeks of testing this serum, I could say, this serum feels very gentle on my sensitive and dehydrated combination skin. Even on the days where my skin barrier is compromised, this feels nice on my skin. It really helps in decreasing the oiliness of my skin, especially on my T-zone area. I noticed my skin becomes less angry and calmer after few weeks incorporating this serum into my routine, I get less acne than usual and not to forget, how it helps to brighten my overall skin complexion after weeks of usage.

I believe, the continuation of using this serum will show more impressive result, as for now, I only used half of the bottle. It is easy to see if you are happy having/using certain skincare products; you are using them faster than you think you are capable of.

Rate: 5/5  

You can get this serum at wortheecosmetics.com only at RM 75 for 30ml.  

 

Curel Makeup Cleansing Gel Review

Curel Intensive Moisture Care Makeup Cleansing Gel (130g)

I was searching for a very gentle yet effective first cleanser, I googled then this cleansing gel came up. I tried to read as many as possible reviews on this. I had good feelings about this one and right away made a purchase on watsons shopee on 3.3 monthly sale. 

Texture: It comes out in a gel form and feels like a balm once you warm it up. 

How this work: This works exactly like cleansing balm, squeeze an adequate amount of it, and warm it up between your palms and then massage it on your skin well, to take off your sunscreen residue or light make up. But it might require you to massage longer than an oil cleanser to really cleanse everything.

Verdict: I-I, I found it! The one that cleansed so well, very effectively, doesn't dry out my dry skin AT ALL, not even a bit of drying feeling afterwards. It doesn't make me uncomfortable in anyways, even in a slightest. I am very choosy with my cleanser and before this, none impressed like how this one did. Farmacy Green Clean is nice but this one is far more gentle than anything I had tried. It's like the real definition of a gentle first cleanser. 

It turns milky once it gets in contact with water. This is my way, I massage it all over my face with my clean, dry hands and then, after a while, I wet my hands and continue massaging for another few minutes, then I rinse well. Then, I continue with second cleanser. 

It could be cleansed easily without leaving any thin layer of film and I really love the after rinsed feel.

And I really like the fact it comes in a sqeeze tube and its gel texture allows me to do my first cleanse while lying down on my bed and listen to podcasts/songs or just lying quietly while keep massaging my face. Yes, I prefer to do my first cleanse in my bedroom. It doesn't get messy at all. 

To those who badly wants gentle first cleanser, or to those who have easily sensitised skin, irritated, dry or very dry but still wants to enjoy double cleanse, this cleansing gel is definitely for you! 

Bought this for RM35.70 during sale on shopee watsons.

⭐️: 5/5 #ainimentariapproved

Axis-y Sunday Morning Refreshing Cleansing Foam Review

Axis-y Sunday Morning Refreshing Cleansing Foam 120ml

Key ingredients: Birch Sap, Green Tea, Centella Asiatica, Licorice Root Extract, Allantoin.

Thoughts: The texture of this pH balanced cleanser (5.5) is white creamy as you can see in the pictures provided. The scent really reminds me of Hada Labo Moisturising cleanser, really similar though. 

Honestly, I am not a fan of foam cleansers since they are typically drying and quite stripping. The fact that foam cleanser foams so well, I only feel like moving the foam around my face without really cleanse my face well. 

But I have read few convincing reviews about this cleanser and of course I'd love to give it a try. Thank you @nattacosme for this cleanser! 

This cleanser foams well but doesn't feel stripping or drying at all, it is claimed because of the aquaxyl. It feels gentle on my skin, easily washed off too and leaving my skin soft and well-cleansed. 

My skin doesn't have any bad reaction to this cleanser, so far so good! This cleanser also can be used to take off my chemical sunscreen residue. But bear in mind, this cleanser is not a great one if you are using high-water resistant sunscreen or thick mineral sunscreen. You still need first cleanser like cleansing balm/oil cleanser.

A tube of 120ml of this definitely gonna last for another few months! Overall, it is a great experience for me to use this cleanser! 

You can get yours at shopee nattacosme.os at RM40, since currently it is on 11% off.

*This product is gifted by NattaCosme in return for an honest review. 

The Eccentric Aina

 Hey, it's me again. Before you jump into the short story, let me tell you how this story happened to be written. My bestie's sister was asked by her lecturer to write a short story about someone and she had no idea who she should be writing about. Then my best friend suggested her to write about me. My friends including my besties, family, they always think I am unique, rare, weird, eccentric, you name it. I always laugh it off but sometimes those names make me ponder. Some would call me that to highlight that I am different compared to others and some would call me that in a demeaning way, some will do it in another way round. Whatever it is, I acknowledge I do feel different which always makes me feel out of the place most of the times. After all, enjoy this short story!

This is a story about Aina, the most hardworking girl I know. For those who did not know her might think she is arrogant, miss know-it-all, the nerdiest girl. However, her friends and families describes her as…being her. Well, as the older sister her best friend, I would say she is quite eccentric. Truly, I have never met someone like her. How do we know each other? My younger sister is her best friend so she often came home to meet her. So, I ended up became her friend. When we first talk, she insisted on calling me ‘Kak’ even though we are only one year apart. She thought that calling me by my name alone is very rude. She is someone who loves reading non-fiction works. Unlike me who loves fantasy genre books, she hated it. She said that one cannot gain knowledge by simply reading fictions. I thought she was weird. I mean, who would not enjoy some good mysteries or magic? Everyone did! She even finished reading medical related books before her sister who taken the course in university even touched it. She would dedicate her free time reading books even during vacations. When we went to Lego Land in Johor Bharu, she would not let go of her books. She would sit somewhere, reading while me my sister hopped on a roller coaster. Other people would think that she is always studying and reading. People would tell her to be a normal person and just have fun like everyone else but she did have fun…with reading.

She also likes to do almost everything traditionally. She loves making postcards and sending email instead of chatting in WhatsApp application or using social medias. In fact, she seldom touches her phone, unless when she need to make a call or…online classes, which she hated by the way. In her phone, she only has 10 contacts. Although her knowledge is really broad, she did not know how to socialize with people especially with the opposite gender. She did not usually talk with men but if she did, she would tremble unknowingly. Not only with men, she would avoid eye contacts when talking to other people too. This is what makes people dislike her. They thought she’s arrogant and disregard others by not looking at them directly. Trying to talk to her about it is useless because she would not admit it. According to her, a good social life cannot determine a person’s success and being knowledgeable is also a form of socializing. Reading about cultures makes her feel like she experiences it herself and she’s content with it. Another eccentric thing about her is that she hated surprises. Even on my birthday, she would email me the picture of my gift that I would be receiving soon as she was on her way. That was really weird. She would also give herself a present every year before her birthday. She would collect her favourite blog entries and compiled it in her scrapbook. Despite her rather unique character, she is very insightful. People would often go to her to talk about their problems and she would give her honest opinion and advices without any bias and she would not sugar coat her words. Sometimes, the truth hurts but that is exactly what we all need, isn’t it?